Seduced (Royal Expat Series Book #1) Read online

“Matilda!” Damian gasped, disentangling himself from Colin and rushing to embrace her while his opponent was still dazed.

  “Damian, oh god!” Matilda said, returning the hug with all her strength, drinking in his presence like a tonic for all the world’s ills. She had almost forgotten how delicious his bold, smoky scent was and how comforting his strong arms felt.

  “I love you,” Damian said, talking rapidly, because they could both hear the sounds of voices coming up the stairs and knew it wouldn’t be long before Colin had regained his senses. “I love you so much, Matilda. I will find a way to see you—I promise you.”

  “I’m so sorry,” Matilda said. “I’m so sorry about all of this.”

  “It’s nothing, baby,” Damian said, stroking her hair. “I’ll always come to you.”

  Matilda wanted to say something else—wanted desperately to be able to stay in his embrace longer—but before she could do anything, the security guards from the building were pulling him away. He didn’t resist, but he gave her one last, longing look as they took him out of her sight.

  “Are you alright, ma’am? Sir?” the chief of security asked. “We’re so sorry for the delay. He came with an accomplice and we had no idea he had managed to infiltrate the building until we heard fighting and noises from up here.”

  “It’s no problem,” Colin said, standing up straight and wiping his nose, managing to look dignified despite the huge tear in his jacket.

  “Rest assured that he will be dealt with properly,” the security officer said.

  “Wait, no! He’s innocent. I know him, please—don’t do anything to him,” Matilda begged.

  “Well, we’ll see what he has to say for himself, but breaking into a residential building is a serious offence,” the man said.

  “Thank you,” Colin said, and the security officer smiled and left them alone.

  -

  Matilda didn’t have long to dwell on Damian’s words and appearance before Colin turned to her, his dark eyes like chips of black ice, his face a wall of fury. In an instant she went from confused and happy to terrified. She hadn’t thought through this far. She had only been relieved and happy to see Damian again. What would Colin do now? Surely he wouldn’t go so far as to—to—she couldn’t even bring herself to form the words in her mind.

  “That was not an acceptable scene,” he said, his voice icy.

  “I—I didn’t know he would do that,” Matilda said. “I didn’t mean to make a scene.”

  “I’m trying to prevent this sort of thing from happening and you cause a huge scene on your front doorstep,” Colin said. “Do you want me to send those photos to your father?”

  “No,” Matilda said emphatically. “I didn’t know he was going to come here. I haven’t seen him, I’ve done exactly what you wanted.” She hated begging, hated groveling for his approval, but the look in his eyes scared her. She couldn’t tell how far he would go when he was this angry.

  “You didn’t seem to mind, though, did you?” Colin asked. “You ran right into his arms like a traitor.”

  “I told you already,” Matilda said, her temper rising as he mocked her. “I love him. You’re the one keeping us apart for no good reason. Why shouldn’t I want to see him? I’m not a doll who you can play with. I’m a real woman with real feelings. Of course I was glad to see him. Why wouldn’t I be?”

  “You stupid girl,” Colin sneered. “Do you think what you have with that tramp is love?” A little fleck of spit was forming at the side of his mouth, and Matilda had to suppress the urge to back away.

  “What would you know about love?” she asked.

  “More than a little girl like you,” Colin said, taking a step closer to her. Matilda stood her ground, not wanting to seem weak in front of him.

  “You’ve lived in a castle in the clouds your whole life,” Colin continued, his face forming an ugly smirk. “You’ve been petted and coddled by your parents, your teachers and your friends. You’ve never been exposed to lust, to greed.

  “Do you think that he loves you? Do you think that he came here because he cares about you?”

  “He does,” Matilda said hotly.

  Colin laughed, a mocking, unpleasant laugh.

  “How sweet,” he said patronizingly. “You think he came here because he cares about you. Well, let me tell you the truth that you’ve been protected from all these years. Nobody loves you, princess. Everyone you’ve ever been around only wants your money, your status. Everyone wants a piece of the royal family—even if it is just an illegitimate almost royal.”

  “He doesn’t know I’m royal,” Matilda said. “He likes me for me.”

  “The night you two met, I saw him looking at you. It wasn’t like I saw in his face—it was lust, like an animal stalking his prey. He wanted to fuck you, princess. That was all. He wanted your pretty little white thighs wrapped around him as he screwed you. Didn’t you hear me when I told you before? He admitted it to me himself.”

  Matilda sat silently. She knew it wasn’t true. Colin was just trying to dominate her, to make her feel isolated and alone. She knew how much Damian cared—would he have risked coming here otherwise? Maybe he had just seen her as someone to have fun with at first, as she had with him, but now—he’d said he loved her. She believed it with all her heart. What else was in it for him?

  “You still don’t believe me?” Colin asked. “Well, let me tell you something else. When I saw him looking at you like a piece of meat I told him to back off.”

  “You what!” It burst out of Matilda’s mouth before she could stop it. It was unbelievable how possessive and interfering he was. It was ten times worse than having her father breathing down her neck.

  “Well, he didn’t want to back off—not because he wanted to get to know you, princess, but because he thought you were up for it—which you obviously were. He thought you were the kind of hussy he could get into bed. That’s it—and the fact that I opposed it only made the thrill better for him.”

  Matilda didn’t respond. She knew he was only trying to provoke her and drive her away from Damian—but after hearing those little details she couldn’t help wondering if there was any truth in what he had said. Had he really talked to Damian? What had Damian said to him?

  “Ahh, I see that sweet doubt in your eyes,” smirked Colin. “Should I go on?” Without waiting for her answer, he continued. “You want to know why he didn’t stop at just the one quick, easy fuck? You brought him back here.

  “Any man with half a brain could see you were rich and connected looking around this place. A spacious apartment all to yourself in the center of Georgetown? Nobody but a millionaire could afford one of these places. He saw right away that you were as rich as cream and he thought he’d string you along a little and milk you for all you were worth.”

  “That’s a lie,” Matilda burst out. “He’s never asked for a penny from me.”

  “And why would he need to when he could break in here?” Colin asked. “Do you really think he was coming up to see you? He knew it was over and he wanted his prize.

  “What? You thought that he wanted you for your personality? He’s known you for a week. He knows less than nothing about you,” Colin continued relentlessly. “All he wanted was some easy booty and, if he could get it, some cash out of the deal.”

  “He’s not like that,” Matilda said as it looked like Colin had finished his monologue. “Colin, my father hired you to protect me from a bad element. I understand that, and I—I’m grateful for you looking out for me.” She almost choked on the words. “But if that’s all you’re worried about, then please, please give Damian a chance. Talk to him, let me see him just for a little bit. I’ll take the full blame if it ends badly, but please, please, just give him a chance.”

  “Silly girl,” Colin said. “Do you really think I care if he is a good guy or not? He isn’t worthy of you, and I won’t let you see him.”

  “But it’s what I want,” Matilda said, and she knew immediately that she’d
made a huge mistake. Colin’s eyes narrowed.

  “You have no idea what you want,” he said. “Why do you like him? Because he’s handsome? Because he’s filled your mind with unrealistic ideas and expectations?

  “The reality is that nobody gets what they want. You have to do what other people expect of you, and you have to watch the people around you enjoying themselves at your expense. Well not anymore. I’m going to take what I want for once, and you can forget about what you want.”

  He made a move towards her, and Matilda backed against the wall, putting her hands up over her head to protect herself. She cringed backwards as she felt Colin’s hands on her waist, stroking the material of her t-shirt, lingering on the curve of her waist.

  “Stop, please,” she begged him, trying to push his hands away.

  “Why? It’s what I want.” He threw her words back at her in a mocking tone of voice. “Damian should be nothing to you—less than worthless. I’m right here. Your father trusts me, and if you don’t obey me, I have the photos. It’s in your best interest to learn how to want me back, princess.”

  “How could I ever want someone like you?” Matilda asked, lashing out and squirming out of his grasp. He grabbed her easily and managed to pin her arms against the wall.

  He put his face close to hers, so close that she could see the coarse pores on his nose and across his cheeks, and smell the hot, sour reek of his breath.

  “Just sit quiet,” he whispered, sending gusts of his foul breath across her face. She turned away in disgust. “You’ll learn to like it.”

  He captured her lips with his, and they were cold and slimy like slugs crawling on her, clammy and disgusting.

  She pressed her lips together tightly, fighting to drag her head to one side in order to resist his advances. His lips on her skin made her want to scream, as if dead things were crawling on her. She tried to picture Damian, to picture herself safe and happy, but Colin’s unwanted body pressing against her was too much.

  “Stop,” she screamed. “Colin, stop!”

  “Ssh, princess,” he whispered against her cheek, causing her to shudder in revulsion. “I’m going to make you feel just the way he makes you feel. It’s just flesh. I’m going to make you forget him. I’m the only one, princess. There’s no one else—just me.”

  Matilda hated to be weak, but she couldn’t stop the hot tears from seeping down her cheeks. She was trembling, trying to hold in the sobs as Colin’s cold, clammy fingers slipped under her shirt, violating her soft skin—skin that only belonged to Damian’s warm, kind fingers.

  “Doesn’t it feel good?” Colin whispered.

  “No, no, please,” Matilda sobbed. “Stop, stop.”

  “Shut up!” Colin slammed his fist into the wall, causing her to cringe back even further. “You’re going to enjoy this. Say it to me! I am going to enjoy this.” He said the words slowly, his face firm and uncompromising. “Say it!”

  “I can’t,” Matilda said, her sobs uncontrollable. “You disgust me.”

  “Shit!” Colin let go of her, shoving her hard so that she fell onto the ground. “You’re not even pretty any more, crying and sobbing like a child. I don’t even want you when you’re like that. I want you to get aroused for me.”

  That was never going to happen, Matilda thought resolutely, curling into a thankful ball, glad that his assault had stopped if even for a moment. She could still feel his clammy touch on her skin like a poison, and all she wanted to do was step into a scalding shower and scrub until her skin burned.

  “I want you to scream for me like you do for that stupid hippie,” Colin continued. “You’d better learn how to accept me, princess, because I’m the only one left for you. If you contact Damian ever again, I’ll send your father those photographs. If you try to tell anyone about this, I’ll send him the photographs. If you do anything I don’t like ever again, you can kiss your reputation goodbye.”

  Matilda was so burnt out that she couldn’t even reply. She just sat and cried, begging internally for him to leave.

  “I’m not a monster,” Colin said, a little more gently. “I won’t force you, not now. I’ll give you one more chance. I’ll give you a little more time to realize that I’m the only man you will ever be able to be with. Just me—no one else. Who else would want a cheap slut like you?

  “I’ll give you one week to completely get in line with what I expect from you. After that, I won’t care whether you want it or not.”

  With those parting words, Colin turned around and strode out of the room, slamming the door shut behind him.

  -

  As soon as she heard the door slam, Matilda jumped to her feet and ran to the door, turning the deadbolt behind him so that there was no way he could get back in. Then, she stumbled towards the bathroom, making straight for the shower. It was a beautiful shower, with a wide head and a powerful stream of water which felt like you were immersing yourself in a waterfall. She fumbled with the dials until the water coming out was scalding hot to touch and the steam was thick and heavy in the little shower stall. Shedding her clothing, she climbed in, flinching as the water burned her skin.

  She stood under the spray, gasping, trying to wash away all memory of the last twenty minutes. Grabbing her loofah, she lathered it with sweet, cherry-scented soap and scrubbed hard at her skin until it was angry and red.

  She relished the burn on her skin as she scrubbed it repeatedly. Anything felt better than Colin’s foul fingers, his damp, fetid breath. She renewed her efforts until her nostrils couldn’t detect even a hint of him. Once she was finished, she dropped the loofah and simply stood there, letting the hot water envelop her, hammering down on her neck and shoulders.

  She watched the water droplets on her lobster red skin with a strange fascination. She felt broken and disjointed, as if all her emotions had somehow leaked out and washed down the drain with the soap suds. The memory of Damian coming to her apartment, of Colin threatening her, trying to seduce her, were all distant, disassociated from her. It felt as if they had happened to someone else—as if she had just watched a particularly traumatizing movie.

  Looking at her hands, she could see the purple bruises already blossoming on her wrists from where he had grabbed her. It had really happened, so why couldn’t she feel it?

  She must be in shock, she realized, and accepted the fact easily, her emotions not currently accepting new input. Well, that was the best time to think this through logically.

  But she couldn’t. Her mind was too dazed. All she could think was that no matter what, she had to talk to Damian. Somehow, that would make it all better. Just being with him, away from Colin, would make the whole problem go away.

  It must have been at least an hour before she finally turned off the shower and stepped into a warm flannel bathrobe. Her skin was wrinkled and red from the water and heat, and the entire bathroom was a whirl of steam. She cracked the window to allow the steam to escape, and padded to her bedroom, where she got out a notepad and pen.

  She wanted to cushion her mind from all the terror and unhappiness which had touched it over the past few weeks. She wanted to be alone with Damian, in a safe, comforting embrace where nothing bad could touch her.

  Taking a deep breath, she wrote a title in the notepad, forming the letters carefully, then looking at them, inspecting their appropriateness:

  The First Time I Met Damian

  She nodded in satisfaction, and let the memories of that first night envelope her—how she had felt, Damian’s face, the things they had talked about. She let it pour from her pen onto the creamy white paper, barricading her mind from anything unpleasant or upsetting. She wrote and wrote, reliving the happiness and excitement.

  Even though he wasn’t there, she let Damian protect her from all fear and harm.

  -

  Matilda went into work the next day pale and resolute, wearing concealing clothes to cover the bruises Colin had left all over her body. She had spent the previous evening wallowing in memorie
s of her brief, beautiful time with Damian, but as soon as she had closed her eyes, darkness had descended and she had been bombarded by the truth.

  Everything inside her felt irreparably broken, but somewhere within her she had found a small amount of determination. She knew that she had to be strong and not depend on anyone else.

  After talking to the guards in her building and reassuring herself that no charges had been brought up against Damian, she had left for work as usual, trying to keep her face free from the troubles eating away at her on the inside.

  She thought about the letter in her purse. She had woken up early that morning after very little sleep and thought hard about what exactly to write. The words were difficult and it took her a while to find exactly the right ones. The contents of the letter were like a cold, hard rock which had settled in her heart, but she knew that she had made the right choice.

  Dear Damian, the letter read,

  I’m sorry about what happened last night. I never wanted to hurt you or get you into trouble. Being with you has been like coming alive. I’ve cherished every minute of our time together, but it was never anything more than a dream.

  I know that you said you’d try to find a way to see me, but I want you to give up on it. I can’t be together with someone like you. I’m not as strong as you think I am and it would never work out between us.

  Good luck on your travels and stay safe. Your friend,

  Matilda

  She had read and reread the words so many times that she could recite them out loud. She hated the feeling of weakness and finality which accompanied the letter, but she also knew that there was no other way. It was too dangerous to see him again. She didn’t know what Colin might do, but she knew that the only way to keep him away from her was to stay away from Damian. Maybe then he might not be so driven to try and force himself on her. She might be able to play along for a little while, say that if he gave her more time maybe there was a future for them.

  The idea made her sick, but it wasn’t like she had another option. With the blackmail and the threat of him forcing himself on her, the only thing she could do to protect herself was to play along with him until she came up with a better idea for how to save herself.