Seduced (Royal Expat Series Book #1) Page 11

  She thought about Colin. There was no way that trusting her would mean she could see Damian. He wanted her for himself, and he didn’t want anyone else to have her.

  But what if… a thought occurred to her which, while unpleasant, was somehow compelling. Caroline had said that all men were easy to handle if you knew which buttons to push…

  She knew what Colin wanted. He wanted her. He wanted to have her. To sleep with her. If she slept with him, maybe—just maybe—she would be allowed to see Damian.

  It was the only way, Matilda realized. This was the only way to get out of her situation. She had to agree to have sex with Colin.

  -

  Matilda wasn’t sure if her resolution would last until the morning. Every time she remembered the feeling of Colin’s presence near her it made her shudder. Would it even be possible for her to force herself to sleep with him? But she woke up resolute, knowing that it was the only solution in which she would have any power at all.

  Would it really be so bad? After all, she could lie back and close her eyes, think hard about anything but what was happening, and it would be over before she knew it. The idea made her sick, but it would be worth it if she was able to see Damian freely. Who knew, maybe Colin would get tired of her afterwards and leave her alone?

  She had kept the door to her apartment locked and bolted since the last incident with Colin. Now, she unlocked the door, stepping confidently towards Colin’s apartment in order to confront him. She had her entire speech prepared: she will sleep with him if, and only if, he agrees to her terms. He will allow her to see whoever she wants without showing the photos to anyone. If he refuses to go along with her offer, she will make sure that he never gets what he wants. There were some flaws in the plan, but she was hoping that the idea of her coming to her willingly would be enough for him to accept the idea.

  She knocked on the door, steeled for the conversation. Colin answered in his pajama pants, his stringy torso bare, and she forced herself not to shudder at the sight of him half naked.

  “What a pleasant surprise,” he smiled. “The princess has decided to come out of her castle.”

  “Can I come in? I have something to discuss with you,” said Matilda, trying to stay strong even though part of her wanted to turn and leave. His physical presence intimidated her, not to mention the fact that just looking at him made her sick.

  Nevertheless, when he held open the door, she forced herself to enter, sitting down on his sofa and crossing her legs, trying to seem at ease and natural.

  “So? Have you seen sense?” Colin asked cockily. “Or was there something else?”

  “I have a proposition for you,” Matilda said. “I have something you want, right? You want me: my body.”

  “I can’t lie,” Colin shrugged, eyeing her breasts appreciatively. “You’ve got a sexy body and I want it. What’s your point?”

  “But you don’t just want it—I mean, you don’t want to take it. You want me to give it to you. Isn’t that right?”

  “I don’t have a problem taking what I deserve,” Colin said, “but if you were willing to cooperate it would be a lot easier.”

  “Right,” Matilda said, trying not to let her disgust show on her face. “So I have a proposition. I give you what you want—me, willing to sleep with you—but only in return for what I want.”

  “Oh?” Colin said, leaning forward with guarded interest in his face. “And what’s that?”

  “If I agree to sleep with you, I want you to let me see Damian,” she said in a rush. “It’s a fair exchange.”

  Colin appeared to think about it for a few moments. Then, he burst out laughing. First Matilda was startled, then she began to feel indignant.

  “I get what I want and you get what you want,” she said.

  “You’re so naïve, princess,” Colin mocked. “What made you think that what you want ever factored into it at all? I have all the power—all of it. You have nothing to negotiate with. Your body? It’s a sweet offer, but I think I’d like it all to myself, thanks. I don’t want Damian or any other man getting to use my property.

  “Just because I’ve been lenient so far doesn’t mean that I’ll continue to be so. I can have you whenever I like whether you want it or not. Why would I agree to share you with that man?”

  “So you’d rather rape me than give me one small thing which would make me come to you willingly?” Matilda said.

  Colin frowned.

  “I never said rape,” he said. “I’d only be taking what I deserve. What gives you the right to reject me? Because you’re royalty? Does that make you too good for the likes of me? I’ve got money. I own a car and property. I could make a good husband for you, Matilda.”

  “It’s called being a human being,” Matilda said, trying to ignore the bad taste in her mouth as the word ‘husband’ and the word ‘Colin’ both mixed together in her head. “By rights I should have the freedom to choose who I sleep with—not only that but where I go and what I do, especially who I marry. What you are doing is rape and blackmail. If you can’t bear to face the facts, you shouldn’t be committing the crimes.”

  Her words seemed to have an effect on Colin. In his mind, she was sure that he was the hero of the piece, entitled to what he wanted and clever for finding a way to achieve it. He seemed to truly believe that he was justified in what he was doing. If she could somehow manage to impress on him that he was not only hurting her but also breaking the law, then maybe she could get out of this. Maybe Caroline had been right; she only needed to find the right buttons to press.

  But she was too hopeful, too soon. The look of doubt faded from Colin’s face.

  “Tell you what, princess, I’ll think about it—is that good enough? But I promise nothing. I really don’t like to share,” he said.

  “Thank you,” Matilda said. She could tell from his face that pressing her case would only make him angry. Instead, she left the room silently, hoping that somehow he would agree to her request.

  It was ironic that she was hopeful that even this bleak request would be fulfilled, when in reality, he won either way. Either way, she lost herself to him.

  -

  Matilda lay in bed that night with a new thought that she had not considered before. What if she went home?

  It was a tantalizing thought. If she went home, it would be like wiping the slate clean. She would be able to rid herself of Colin completely. She could get a job fitting for a royal princess, and work quietly, like her sister, without drawing attention to herself. It would be what her father wanted, and it would mean getting away from all the mistakes she had made here.

  Somehow, though, she couldn’t face it. It was clear to her why she hadn’t thought of the solution before. Going home would be like losing the battle. It would be like giving up and admitting defeat. If she went home, she would have traded in her last chance to be someone. Instead, she would have to resign herself to being the media’s darling and her father’s instrument. She might even have to do the same as Caroline and accept a suitable husband, one of her father’s choosing. That would hardly be any better than submitting to Colin!

  Besides, even if she went home, those photos of her would not disappear. Who knows what would happen to her or when they might surface? She would have to live in fear of them for the rest of her life.

  She supposed it was still possible to come clean and tell her father, but she knew how he would react. He would never truly respect her again. He could never understand the strength of her feelings towards Damian. It was as if she didn’t even have full control of her own actions. She was so intoxicated by him that to have stopped herself would have been a crime against her nature.

  How could a strict man who never did anything for pleasure ever understand that?

  No matter how she looked at it, she knew that she had to play it out here. Damian was worth that. She would not give up on the best thing ever to happen to her. No way!

  When she thought about Damian, the way he made he
r feel was still as potent as ever. She could feel his lips on her neck, the soft brush of his fingertips against her breasts.

  She gasped as she remembered the sensation, as if it was real and happening right at that moment. She teased her skin lightly, imagining that it was Damian’s hand tracing soft patterns on her ribcage.

  She let her hand slide upwards, tweaking one nipple with her fingers. Her breathing hitched, and she could see Damian’s smirking face on the insides of her eyelids.

  Her other hand crept downwards as she teased her breasts, feeling the warm strength of Damian’s fingers instead of her own small, delicate hands. Her right hand crept beneath the waist of her panties, and she groaned at the warm, wet slickness which met her.

  She found her clit, pressing it gently, bathing in the image of Damian’s clever tongue, licking and flicking her into arousal.

  Working with two of her fingers pumping in and out of her pussy and her thumb caressing her clit, her breathing became more and more ragged. She wanted to feel Damian between her legs, his rock hard cock sliding into her, thrusting with unbridled passion.

  The pressure built, and she tugged and squeezed at her breasts as she pumped her fingers faster, working up a furious rhythm.

  She came hard, and the sensation of Damian’s presence dissipated as she came back to the dark bedroom and her desperate situation. The brief glow of pleasure disappeared as soon as it had come, like the flame of a candle being extinguished by a gust of cold air.

  She couldn’t believe that Damian could do that to her—take her away from everything. Even the thought of him reminded her of how good it had been. She couldn’t give that up—no way!

  But… the way she felt about Damian was so strong that it controlled her body. Would she really have to sleep with Colin just to see him? She knew she had no choice. It was either sleep with Colin and not see Damian, or possibly sleep with Colin and see Damian. Wasn’t the second option better?

  Try as she might, it seemed as though those were her only options. Colin was blackmailing her. He had an iron grip on her freedom and there was nothing she could do but be exposed and humiliated or obey him.

  Unless… the thought struck her with the force of a truck, and she lay still for a few seconds, letting the possibility settle in her mind.

  Would it be possible to stop the blackmail at its source?

  She was almost angry that it hadn’t occurred to her before, but then again, she had been in a state of extreme panic after Colin had tried to force himself on her, so she hadn’t been thinking clearly. But the more she thought about it, the better it seemed.

  If she could only get those photographs back from Colin, there would be no need for any of this duplicity! She would be able to do what she liked and Colin would lose his power. The first thing she would have to do was ensure that her father got rid of him. He was a dangerous man and she was frightened at the thought of what he might do if the power was taken away from him.

  Nevertheless, she had to try. If she could get the photos back, she could destroy them and see Damian without being afraid of the consequences. She would have to tell her father this time around. If she didn’t, it would open up the possibility of something else getting in their way. If she could get him to approve, or even if he didn’t… the thought of being able to be with Damian just as they had been in that one beautiful week they had spent together was like a dream come true.

  But first there was the matter of the photographs. How would she get hold of them?

  She knew that Colin worked more or less the same hours as her—as well as acting as her bodyguard, he did a lot of office work for her family. He was supposedly here on some important business, which kept him tied up downtown for a lot of the day.

  She knew that he was very smart and not likely to cut any corners when it came to security. He would keep his door locked and the photographs safely hidden. But would he really have copies on him at all times? It seemed too paranoid even for him, and she thought it more likely that they were safely hidden in his apartment. If that was the case, she could find them—and destroy them.

  Matilda swallowed hard. What she was planning to do was technically breaking and entering. She might even need to break into a safe or break a lock. It seemed like it was part of some crime drama. How had her life turned into this? Perhaps it just wasn’t in her destiny to live a simple, easy life. Nevertheless, she would have to do it if she ever wanted her freedom.

  At that moment, she decided. She had to at least try. Her life couldn’t exactly get much worse, could it?

  -

  By the next morning, Matilda had her plan perfectly fine-tuned, or at least as finely tuned as it was possible to make such a dangerous and risky plan. She knew that Colin would probably find out almost immediately about the loss, and she would have to take the risk that he would try to hurt her. She had considered calling the police on him, but then she would have to show the photos as evidence of his blackmail, and there was no way she wanted them to ever get out!

  In the end, she had decided to wait in her apartment while he discovered the loss and wait until he cooled down before talking to him. She would tell him to resign his position and leave forever or she would tell the police. That way, she would be safe and he would be gone.

  She decided to feign illness and leave work an hour early at the end of the day. That way, Colin would have no way of knowing about her plan. If she took the whole day off, it was likely that he would become suspicious and either follow her to see what she did or take the photos with him, suspecting what she was going to do.

  If she had an hour extra, it would be plenty of time to search out the pictures and destroy them.

  As planned, she gave Sylvie an excuse and headed back home at 4, confident that she had plenty of time to get into Colin apartment, search for the photos and get out again.

  She already had her entry way planned, but the execution was a little more daunting than the theory. She lived on the third floor of the small apartment building, with Colin directly beneath her on the second floor. Her balcony was directly above his, and she thought it would be an easy matter to drop down onto his balcony from hers.

  Now that she looked down to Colin’s balcony, slightly to the left of hers and therefore directly beneath her if she were to slide over the railings and drop down, it seemed farther away than before. If only she had a spare key to his apartment as he did for hers!

  Bracing herself, and thanking her lucky stars that she had thought to change into pants, she swung one leg over the railing of her balcony. Had her apartment always been so high up? She wondered if she should drop a pillow or something down first to soften her landing, or use a sheet tied to the bars of her balcony to gently climb down. However, she didn’t want to lose her nerve—or the short amount of time remaining to her.

  She swung the other foot over the balcony and looked down. Colin’s balcony only protruded ever so slightly to the left, so there was mostly just an expanse of cold, hard ground, far below her.

  Taking a deep breath, Matilda readjusted her position so that her knees were poking through the bars and her hands were at the base of her balcony. This was it. Now all she had to do was swing down and land on Colin’s balcony. If only she’d been more interested in gymnastics at school… Those singing lessons had been a stupid idea!

  Closing her eyes wasn’t a very good idea given the circumstances, but Matilda did it anyway. She unhooked her knees and extended her arms slowly, so that her legs were dangling downwards, hovering above Colin’s balcony. It was a good six foot drop still—if only she were taller! Her sister, if she ever chose to do anything so reckless, would have done far better. She was a good four inches taller than Matilda, who barely reached 5’3”.

  It was at this point that Matilda began to reconsider her master plan. She didn’t dare to look down—the thought of dangling from such a height made her dizzy, and dizziness was the last thing that she needed right now. If only she’d been sensible and
used a sheet or something to climb down. At least then there might have been the possibility of climbing back up! As it was now, she was stuck. She couldn’t get back up even if she wanted to—her thin arms wouldn’t support her weight.

  Her hands were beginning to ache from clinging to the ribbed metal. She knew that she had to do it soon. There was no getting out of it. She was either going to land on the balcony, or this was all going to be over much sooner than she had expected.

  With a quick prayer to anyone who might have been listening, Matilda let go. For a moment she was suspended in mid-air, and she felt as if she had just jumped from the top of the cliff, falling down, down, until the grey sea came up to swallow her. After just a moment, though, she hit solid ground with a bump. She fell on all fours like a cat on the comfortingly solid surface of the balcony below, and breathed out a long sigh of relief. She had done it! It was such a good feeling after the impending panic—almost as if she had just finished a marathon or saved a kitten from a burning building. The adrenaline pumping through her was like a drug, and she had to remind herself that she had important work to do.

  Pulling herself together with a quick shake, she got up off the ground, brushing herself off before turning to assess her surroundings. Like her balcony, Colin’s had a sliding door which led into his apartment. She had a sudden nasty feeling that perhaps it was locked. After all, Colin was trained in security, so he was probably a little more careful than her about keeping his apartment impenetrable.

  She gave the door a cautious tug, wondering what she would do if it was locked—she could hardly sit around on the balcony waiting for Colin to come back, unless she was some sort of glutton for punishment.

  To her relief, though, the door clicked open easily. As she had thought: nobody ever locked their balcony door. What was the point when the only thing that could reasonably break in was a highly skilled pigeon?